


Eight Minutes And Twenty Three Seconds

by cosmicci



Category: Jaspar - Fandom, youtube - Fandom
Genre: Fluff, Kissing, M/M, Sadness, friends to something more, jaspar moving out, something to make you feel better, the end of an era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-31
Updated: 2016-03-31
Packaged: 2018-05-30 06:58:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,818
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6413560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cosmicci/pseuds/cosmicci
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I need you to see that I love you and I will always be here for you."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Eight Minutes And Twenty Three Seconds

**Author's Note:**

> i was inspired by the recent jaspar events to write this and it's kind of my way of trying to be positive amidst all this stuff, haha. anyway, hopefully it makes you feel better too because what i wrote in this one-shot is basically how i'm feeling about everything <3

 

Joe sat in the middle of his living room, surrounded by empty boxes which he had unpacked long ago. He gently brushed his fingers over the intricate photo frames he had found in one of those many boxes, photo frames he had never really used in his old apartment and let’s be honest, photo frames he hadn’t known he actually had lying around. But that was the old apartment, this was his new chapter and he wanted his new place to be surrounded by memories of his friends and family, memories of warmth and good times. A gentle smile touched Joe’s lips as he pulled apart the first frame and placed a photo inside, he locked the frame in place before turning it around.  
  


  It wasn’t a photo people would normally frame but there was something about it that Joe loved. He loved how Will had captured him and Caspar mid-laugh, he loved how their bodies had just _naturally_ gravitated towards each other as they had doubled over with laughter… it was as if it was almost _normal_ for them to do that, it was as if that was what they had always done. The photo was slightly blurry, fuzzy around the edges but it only made Joe love it even more.  
  


Joe stood up, absently running his fingers through his caramel-coloured hair before stepping over lopsided cardboard boxes and making his way towards the kitchen, the photo clutched firmly in his hands. He placed the frame against the dark tiling of the kitchen counter and studied it with squinted eyes. If it were up to Joe, he would place it on his bedside table, right next to his bed… but that would probably come across as a _little_ weird. It would be weird to have a photo of one of his mates right where he slept… even though he, himself was in the picture.  
  


_Mates. Was that what we were?_  
  


The small boy stepped back slightly and his back met one of the cupboards lining the counter. Joe slumped against it gratefully, as though he needed the support before studying his living room. It was a mess, really. Nothing was in its rightful place yet but that was to be expected since Joe had only moved in last night... it would take him some time to get adjusted, it would take him some time to call the apartment ‘his’... it would take him some time to get used to Caspar _not_ being there. Joe sighed, placing his head in his hands. He had never expected this to be so, fucking difficult.  
  


  But that was what it was, _difficult_. It made him question everything, it made him wonder whether he had made the right decision by coming up with this whole ‘moving-out’ idea and sometimes, like last night, he would regret it. He would want to call Caspar right away and tell him that this had just been a huge mistake… that _they_ had made a huge mistake but he couldn’t… he couldn’t do that when it had been his idea in the first place. The idea had only become a reality after he had planted the seed in Caspar’s head, then after that, Caspar had just agreed without any complaints.  
  


It had hurt a little at the time – the way that Caspar had agreed to it without even questioning it but then, that had just been a cover-up because on that Tuesday morning when Joe had said goodbye to Caspar, the younger boy had hugged him tightly, his tall frame hunched over Joe. He had told Joe that he was going to miss him, he was going to miss living with him, he was going to miss the fucking pranks even and Joe had just laughed through his tears because his own words had been clogged up in his throat, unable to get through. But what he _had_ managed to get through were the words ‘I promise’ because he would do anything for Caspar and that included promising him that nothing would change between them.  
  


He hadn’t broken that promise. He would never break that fucking promise… because it was for Caspar, Caspar who was his best friend, his roommate and his something more.  
  


Joe squeezed his eyes shut tightly before reopening them, he was still met with the same mess and he realized it wouldn’t just _magically_ disappear if he wished it to. He would need to get himself together and start getting his life together because he couldn’t be upset about Caspar. He had no _reason_ to be upset about him because they were still as close as ever, they were still _something_ and he didn’t need to worry about inadvertently losing him.  
  


 As Joe made his way back into the living room, his plans of cleaning everything up came to a halt at the sound of his phone ringing. He looked around wildly, his hair flopping over his forehead as he did so in a desperate bid to locate his phone which was probably submerged in the piles of shit he had lying around. Joe walked briskly to his couch and rummaged through the stuff piled atop it, his eyes briefly skimmed over a fake ear before his hand enclosed around the smooth surface of his phone.  
  


He pulled it out and placed it against his ear just before the ringing stopped, “Hello?”  
  


_“Jooooe!”_ Caspar’s voice cheered from the other end and Joe’s eyes closed briefly at the sound of his voice, he could never get tired of hearing it.  
  


His smile widened, until it was a full-blown grin, _“Caspaaaar,”_ He mimicked.  
  


Caspar giggled quietly from the other end of the line and Joe’s smile didn’t falter, “Are you busy moving in? Do you need my help? I can come over –  
  


“I’m fine,” Joe cut in, he didn’t want Caspar coming around just yet and seeing the chaos that was currently his apartment. “I’m busy but I could use a breather. How are you mate?”  
  


“I’m alright,” the South-African mumbled but Joe could tell there was more to it when Caspar paused. “I’m not actually… I’m lonely. I miss you, Joe.”  
  


Joe’s heart slammed against his ribcage and his eyes flickered over to the photo of them in his kitchen before he sank down onto the couch, his head tilted back against the cushions. He didn’t answer until his heart rate quietened down, he didn’t answer until he was sure he could without stammering, he didn’t answer until his throat unclogged and he found the right words to say… the _honest_ words to say. “I miss you too, Caspar,”  
  


“You do?”  
  


“I do,” Joe whispered. “I really do.”  
  


An exhale of breath was heard from the other end and Joe’s lips twitched. Caspar could be so damn sweet sometimes, so damn _naïve_ because did he really think that Joe didn’t miss him? “Then would you want to come over to mine? We could, you know, play some Fifa… hang out, t-talk… just like old times.”  
  


Joe’s free hand knotted itself in his hair and he tugged at the strands absent-mindedly, something he usually did when he was nervous or worried… or hopelessly in love with his best friend. He looked around his apartment, taking in the chaos before admitting to himself that there was no way he would be able to get _anything_ else done tonight… especially now. His mind was clouded with thoughts of Caspar… his hair, his eyes that were so easy to drown in… and that fucking smile of his, the one that was too bright and too sunshiney for his own good. “I would love to,”  
  


“Really?!”  
  


“Yes, really, you wolly! I’ll be there soon.”  
  


  And Joe left without a second thought because this was the only good thing about their new living arrangements. They were only a few minutes away from each other.  
  


_Eight minutes and twenty three seconds._    
  


When Joe reached Caspar’s door, something slammed into his chest. A feeling that he had refused to acknowledge, a feeling that only grew when Caspar opened said door and threw his arms around Joe, pressing their bodies together. Joe tried his best to ignore how perfectly they fit together… like two puzzle pieces and instead focused on the feeling and the way that Caspar was crushing his chest and how he couldn’t breathe properly because it was just Caspar, _Caspar,_ everywhere.  
  


They may or may not have spent five minutes hugging outside of Caspar’s apartment… but Joe didn’t let it bother him, he just concentrated on the feeling and tried to recall the last time he had really experienced something like that. It was probably a year ago, the night that he had and Caspar constantly skirted around… always avoiding the topic because they _both_ knew something had happened that night, something that would most likely change their relationship forever and maybe that’s why they refused to acknowledge it… maybe because they were both so afraid of losing each other that the only way they knew how _not_ to was to cling onto each other even tighter.  
  


 After they pulled away from each other, the rest of the night had been exactly what Caspar had promised over the phone. They had sat beside each other, playing Fifa for hours and throwing obscene remarks whenever one of them either scored a goal or claimed a victory.  
  


“That’s cheating, Caspar!” Joe had yelled, jumping onto the younger boy’s couch and waving his x-box controller around. “You can’t fucking tickle me during the game, it threw off my whole game!”  
  


“How about now?”  
  


And then, things had escalated into a tickle war which was really the two boys rolling around on the carpet, limbs tangled together and laughter radiating off of their entire bodies.  
  


But now, the tickling had teased, the laughter had quietened down into soft murmurs before dissolving into complete silence because Caspar was asleep. He was asleep on Joe, his head resting peacefully on Joe’s chest. Joe, on the other hand, felt as though his whole body was on fire because suddenly, he wasn’t sure what to do… he wasn’t sure where to put his hands… he wasn’t sure whether even a slight, movement would wake up Caspar because they had never been _this_ close since that night…  
  


_Fuck._  
  


So Joe decided to stay-put until the movie they’d been watching ended, partly because he didn’t want to wake Caspar up and partly because he liked the feeling of Caspar in his arms… and maybe, just _maybe_ because he didn’t want to return home to an empty flat without Caspar’s giggles and Caspar’s warmth. The movie trickled to a close and as the credits rolled, Joe silently slipped off of the couch, making sure to place a cushion under Caspar’s head before turning off the TV and looking back at the blonde boy.  
  


  Caspar was adorable asleep, just like he was adorable when he was awake and Joe gently brushed the boy’s smooth cheek with the back of his hand before reaching for the cream-coloured throw Caspar had placed atop his couch and wrapping it gently around his sleeping form. Joe stepped away and with one last, fond look at the boy he had grown to love, turned away.  
  


  But he couldn’t get far as a hand wrapped around his wrist almost immediately and he veered back around to be met with the startling blue of Caspar’s eyes. “Stay,” Caspar whispered. “Will you please stay, Joe? Just for tonight?”  
  


Joe closed his eyes for a second, “Yes,”  
  


Caspar scooted over slightly on the couch, he peeled the blanket away from his body so that Joe could slip inside before covering them both up. Joe was pressed tightly against Caspar, they lay facing each other with their legs tangled and toes touching; with their arms around each other and their fingers knotted in the other’s hair. It was nice, it was perfect, it was so _fucking_ right and Joe wanted to cry because he wanted this, he wanted it so much.  
  


  They lay in silence for a little while longer before Caspar sniffled and Joe felt a tear land on the skin of his cheek, “Why-why did we move out of the old apartment, Joe?”  
  


Joe raised his head slightly, he freed one of his hands and brought it up to Caspar’s cheek. “Because… because,” He sighed, unsure of what to say because he himself had no, fucking clue. “I don’t know.”  
  


“I miss it,” Caspar murmured, not angry at Joe’s lack of response. “I miss it so much. I miss living with you, I miss being comforted by the fact that you’re only a few metres away from me and that I can run to your room whenever I see something funny or whenever I have a nightmare… even though you always kick me out.”  
  


 They both let out a muffled laugh, a laugh not filled with humor but nostalgia. Joe felt a tear slide down his own cheek and he brushed it away as quickly as it had come, “You can still do that Caspar. Whenever you’re scared or whenever you see something funny… whenever you need me, you can just run down the street to my door and it’ll always be open for you.”  
  


Caspar laughed quietly but his laughter was cut short by the quiet sob that erupted from his chest, the sob that made Joe sit up straighter and wrap the younger boy tightly in his arms. “I miss you, Joe,”  
  


 “Shh,” Joe whispered, stroking Caspar’s hair and pressing feather-light kisses to his forehead. “I’m right here, I’m not going anywhere.”  
  


“But you will be! You’ll be gone in the morning when I wake up –  
  


“Caspar!” Joe sighed, pulling the boy’s face towards his, closer and closer until they were inches apart… until Joe could practically feel Caspar’s short, shallow breaths brush against his lips. “I’m only eight minutes and twenty three seconds away from you and yes, it might be different compared to how we used to live but it doesn’t change anything between us. I _need_ you to see that… I need you to see that I love you and that I will always be here for you, whenever you need me.”  
  


 “I love you too,” Caspar breathed, his blue eyes wide and unblinking as he stared at Joe. Joe was breathless but he stared back at Caspar nevertheless and he couldn’t help it when his eyes flickered down to the South-African’s pretty, pink lips… he couldn’t help it when he leaned forward, closing the remaining few inches between them.  
  


Everything happened so quickly then, the blanket surrounding them dropped to the ground and they were exposed to the cool air circulating around Caspar’s apartment but neither boy seemed to care much because the kiss made up for the coldness. Joe wound up on Caspar’s lap, his lips molded against the other boy’s and as they kissed, so passionately and so… beautifully with their arms gripping each other and their fingers dancing over bare skin, Joe just _knew_ that this wasn’t their first kiss. He just _knew_ that on that drunken night, they had kissed and the memory had gone blurry but neither of them had been able to let go of the lingering imprint each other… neither had been able to forget the taste or the feeling.  
  


 Caspar broke away from Joe’s lips and pressed insistent kisses to Joe’s throat, he sucked at the skin around his neck before biting down on it and Joe moaned, his head falling back with every mark Caspar left behind on his tanned skin. “I remember our first kiss,” Caspar mumbled, his breath hot and heavy against Joe’s neck. “I remember how I wished it hadn’t happened like that… I remember how I wished I could have kissed you properly, I wish I could have made it perfect.”  
  


 “Every kiss of ours is perfect,” Joe whispered, his hands skimming over the small sliver of Caspar’s taut stomach which had been exposed during their heated… make-out. He pressed a kiss to Caspar’s cheek, “Like this one,” He pressed another to his forehead, “And this –  
  


  Caspar grinned, moving away from Joe before he could land his next kiss. Joe smiled down at Caspar, his mind was fuzzy, slightly clouded with lust but strangely, he felt as though he had never been so certain or so clear about something in his life. “Will you be here when I wake up?” Caspar asked meekly, his voice soft and quiet.  
  


“I’ll be here when you wake up,” Joe promised, kissing Caspar’s neck. “And we’ll figure this out together. We’ll figure _us_ out. I love you, Caspar.”  
  


“I love you too,”  
  


Joe wasn’t sure _how_ they would figure it out, but he knew that they would make it work… after all, they were only eight minutes and twenty three seconds away from each other.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> so there we have it! hope you enjoyed it :') a lot of people have been worrying about the whole jaspar situation but i'd like to say that they've only just moved out and they really are only a few minutes away from each other so i think we can expect a whole lot more jaspar this year <33


End file.
